Welcome back everyone. I hope you had a fantastic weekend.
Lets pick our topic for today. Since you can see my title, we will be discussing relationships and how they can become Ships to SH*T. Relationships. Now I usually pick a topic, because it is something that has struck my attention recently or something that I am personally going through. But let’s start on how a relationships starts. You meet someone and it starts to go very well you start dating. From there things get more serious, maybe you hook up (OH YEAH) or maybe you met his/hers friends or family. You start going on to having a relationship. Just you and them, no one else (so you hope) and they become your significant others. OH HOW ROMANTIC, I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU. Okay let’s see how long this last; are they the ONE?!
Well, relationships takes time and work (a sh*t ton of work). Lets talk about the steps for a great and successful relationship.
Key 1. Communication
This is HUGE! You need to talk to your significant other and let them know how you feel. The “I love you’s” and “How are you feelings” are important, but what is more important that will eat you up inside is if you are upset or hurt about something. DO NOT HOLD THAT IN. DO NOT let that be swept under the rug. I come from divorce parents after 31 years together. (YES, they were together my entire life until one day BANG, that’s for another blog). But I have seen it all, the secrets, the lies, the “I’ll get over it”, “they won’t do it again”, etc. Listen up! They may know something is bothering you, but nobody is a mind reader you must communicate and express yourself.
Key 2. Express Yourself
So what is expressing yourself (all I hear is that song by Charles Wright). Basically doing what my girl Lady Gaga is doing up there! But what I am saying, do not change yourself for someone else and don’t hide who you are, because they do not approve. NO! Your significant other must appreciate you whether you are a reader, gamer, explorer, blogger, traveler, painter, etc. We all have things we love to do and that should be brought to the table. I go through some strange phases where one day I want to watch Operas or I want to start blogging about my life, my boyfriend approves and completely encourages me no matter what. That is how it should be. Open safe space for the both of us. No judgement! You can’t lie and hide yourself from someone you are with, it will eat destroy you and eventually take your relationship down with it.
Key 3. No Lies
So why did I make this number 3, why isn’t it one. Well if you are communicating with your partner you wouldn’t have to worry about lies, but even lies slip up here and there. I think this is pretty obvious, DON’T F*CKING LIE! I think this doesn’t need toooooo much explaining, but I will elaborate. Little white lies can just add an unwanted toxic vibe into your relationship you do not want. Whether you are the liar or they are, this lie will grow, someone will get caught and that’s it. You might lose trust that you have been trying to earn for 6/7 months. All it takes is one moment. So why lie, if your significant other understands and respects you they will understand. Maybe be hurt, but then we go back to Key 1; communicate about it and move forward.
Key 4. Respect
You must respect your significant other all the way. Respect their space, privacy and them. It must work both ways, you have to earn their respect, just like they have to earn yours. Don’t give that sh*t away for free! Plus, if you don’t respect your significant other then what are you doing? Also, if they don’t respect your wishes, GET OUT OF THERE! Your body is your temple, nobody should disrespect you in any way where you feel uncomfortable. Not only do they have to respect you, but your friends and family. If they don’t like one of your friends/family members, too bad! They need to respect the fact they are important to you. Nothing is worse when your family or friends don’t lie your partner, that’s when things start to get hostile and adds conflict. If your partner wants to be with you, they will respect that, trust me!
Key 5. Trust
Yup, you said it trust. You have to trust them, their decisions and solutions . You can not micromanage your significant other. This is the last and final key in a relationship. You can build trust with following Keys 1-4, but you can destroy it with something as simple as a white lie or not communicating. It is normal to not trust some right away, it’s like respect. It has to be earned and it takes steps to get there. Eventually one day you will realize that you trust your partner and that they are doing things for the both of you; for your best interest. Sometimes you may not agree with them and that is also normal, but if you trust them you must let them do it their way. You are officially a team when you are in a relationship, whatever you do will affect the person you are with. Good or bad. If they fail you are there to catch them and if you fail you need to trust that they will be there for you. *Trust fall*
A relationship is a ship in itself, you need parts to build it and keep it afloat, if you don’t it will eventually sink. And just like the Titanic, if one side goes down the other will too. Nobody wants that, you both have to be on the same page. Your relationship can go into a relationsh*t in no time! Don’t let that happen. Make up sex is great and all, but how about some hott passionate into each other romance (Yes, Please!) I have seen love last til death do us part (My lovely grandparents) it is out there. It is harder than ever now to concur this with social media, dating apps and sex is easier to find; I get it. It is out there though, a few trial and errors are going to happen. You are going to find yourself, lose yourself and find yourself again. Don’t lose hope, when you hit all the 5 keys above you will realize how easy it is to find the right fit for you. Trust me!